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Because he gets up hours before I do, Captain OCD is explaining part of his morning routine to me.

In the morning I switch between The Weather Channel and the news [by which he means NW Cable News].

You know, you’re getting the weather in St. Louis on The Weather Channel [Mr. Rogers for old people].

Yeah, but it eventually gets back to the local weather.

Which is what you’re getting from NW Cable News, only much more frequently.

Yeah, but I take the average of the two.

You do what now?

If one says it’s going to be 41 degrees and the other says it’s going to be 43 degrees, it’s going to be 42 degrees.

This is why he has to get up so early. These things don’t figure themselves out.